Monday, February 14, 2011

On rye

all the things i wish i had and cant have are around me lately. i want to have all those things i dont have and cant have along side all the things i do have. not having all those things make me think less of the things i do have i relation to all those things i "could have had if only (fill in your favorite reason)". in a way i guess i have always felt this way, even when i knew what i have is what i want and i was happy about it and where i am now is in part a direct result of my awareness of this issue. at the end of each one of these posts i get a flashback of the "i know why i did what i did and why i am where i am, and i am absolutely OK with it and would do it again if i needed to", the reason always being, "i dident want to sleep in a tent any more", and in fact i still dont want to sleep in a tent.

No comments: