in the mean while

a day when i lost track of my self and stopped at a red light, only to find out i was color blind.

mentality

guest post by lux lisbon

the red button

its always better to be a part of somthing.

i am always a part of nothing.

A runnig blade

things that happend today:

1. i bought to much fish for a sishy dinner planed for a few poele on friday, whome i later learnd are not going to attend.

2. i eat breakfast at a fancy coffeyshot in th emimddleo f the jerusalem fish market.

3. two palastinian men, walked in the stre asking about lenses. i figured out its a bulshit hassle because mostley arabs almost never buy form the store only come over to look and touch the stuff. these guys got stright to bussines, asked for a 2.8 lens. but dident want to pay for a canon L lens, so i offered to note worthey tmaron 17-50 2.8 lens as seen on ourias 200d. defently a verry good lens, and even though i say that about anything under my hand at any given time when i sell things, i actualy really belive in this lens, but there was nothing i could say or offer these guys to express my true belife in this sale and the product they bought but i smiled kindley and said - "really, its a verry verry good lens", after the guy who dident talk the whole time asked after he paid if i think its a good lens... in any case i filled out a teritories recipet for them, so they can try and chase the israeli tax atoureties in search of their VAT refund wich i have to mail to the tax offices in three copies and hope it dosent get lost on the way and that htye can match them together and that the soldier can read my boses hand wrting and is in the mood to give them a pass thorugh the checkpoint. god damit. the third reason in one week to fucking not live here.

they paid with cash out of a huge pile of money. maybe 50000 in 200 NIS bills.

4. a motorcycle accident, of wich i took really bad pictures. i suck at this making images when i stressed instead of slowing down and lookign for what i want i am in a rush of sugar and dont think.

i can recognize things from a mile away

i dont know why i agreed to this.

what i konw is there are no answers. i am behind on everything. i cant seem to catch up with my life and i so want to.. fuck.

short waves, long waves

radience.

cold water

i trick, a new one, that you cant read, hear or speak out. relentless.

sushi overkill

some poeple cant have theor picture taken. some of them are secret and cannot be shown to the public, for fear that the secret that they are might cause serius brain damage to the viewrs of the picture, even though in plain sight they are ok to look at and no harm may come to someone just by looking. some of them melt in light of a strobe, usualy securety poeple, they have a genetic weeksness to halogenic gas combustion light products, and with all the reserch and development in the field of pesonal safty for securety personel they are still not inocualted for this ailment. most of them are affected at the genetic level at the day of induction, its comes with the badge of honor and gun. the rest of them are afraid, afraid that they have done somting wrong, that thier picture is beeing taken for some malicius purpose. if you are beeing photographed somthing is wrong, and they must protest.

none of the aboe mentioned poersons and or persons unknown care about poeple looking at them and taking theor picture wiht the most sophisticaed camera of all, not of them are afraid about beeing imprinted in ones brain for ever, no one will ever ask you politly or not politly to forget his face for they are a secrect of national security. no one will fear that they have done some awfull deed just becuase someone is looking at them.

none of these sacred and scared individuals will ever thing twice about all the thousands and millions of images beeing captured and recorded of himself, at any given time whilehe is walking down a busy city street, standing at a traffic light, going in to a private residance or bussines, no one will ever walk in to a back and ask the clerck to earase his face from the security video tape because he is a secret incarnated. no secret service man will ever mention the fact he is a secret service man unless he is asking you to come along with him for a chat. even though securety cameras work with out the touch of a human the images are still recorded, however its only when a human actualy is the author of the image when it becomes a problem for someone. moreover, a picture of a noone person in the street is just a picture of noone (unless someonoe knows who it is) -

untill - he walkes up and tells you he is someone. if he hadent mentioned it you might have thought nothing of it and moved on, but now that you know there is a secrect behind the face of a person, you are intrigued and iust persue the sweet bitter trouth. in plais sight everything is alowed. ther is no privacy in public.

isralis are crazy. jew setlres are worse. they are crazy but they themselves and everyone else thinks they are comletly sane.

i will protect my sanity at any cost. even at the cost of losing it.

death of a tierd man

this day mrakes the end of the year. again. just like yesetrday marked it. today is again another day in the end. another day where i did no work, had no original ideas and made absulutly no progress, well some progress in reverse. i am getting more tierd then hours i have to sleep it off. my back aches i guess due the lack of downtime. tommrow is the opening. trevor wanted to know whats it like. its bad. and nothing god about it. tommorow calls me.

i met wisam today. he is the person because of whome i went to bezalel in the first place. he hasaent changed a bit since the day i met him more then 6 years ago.

unbottled rage of a racialy opressed nation

i hate blogs. they are stupid. i read these all the time where poeple write every fucking hting tha happens to them and who the fuk reads all this shit? its fucking endless, i mean why do poele invest so much effort in this stuuf when its obvius that no one gives two shits about it? i understad that pole like writng and have a need to express themsleves verbaly in this way or another but this is an unadresses blob of endless worthless words, and even thoght some blogs, like trevors or shane lavaltte(where the fuck do u all get this art critique shit all the time? do you wirete it yourself?) that i guess could be usfull to one searching the matter at hand in that particular blog but in any other case why bother? this is just insane.

having said this, today were the final reviews of my exhibition of the final roject for school. 20 or so guest cretiques were invited and were split to two man teams to cover the 40 students, twice for each one. what a wase of time. i thought this might be usfull, enlighitng, educating, and all it was, was just a waste of air. nothing was said, not only about my work, that has verry little to be said about it anyway and isent a verry good work allaroudn, but also on the the best most award winnig praised works. even those couldent squeese out a squirt of piss from this fucking pressured tampon like tel avivian big city muesoum couratrs anal retentive smoking galleriie visitors. si why does the phorography department spend all its gues lecturers budget on this stupid exersize? its good for the company. and whats good for the company is good for america. their gonna come out of this rich. and im gonna come out of it dead. jusr like that.

sunday the 22

this day had less then nothing. less then nothing. it cant be helped, even though sometimes these things make me smile. it had begun at 7am in the far north and ended 200+kms, one chorisos and 14 hours later.

saturday the 21 (untitled) aint i cool..

this weekend had more to it then meets the eye.

A Sin (for days past, and those to come)

less words more actuations.

a puddle of milk in the driveway

a day in three acts (and a suplement)

this day started with the usual early morning rutine, expect for some reason i was not the first perosn t get up and somone had already brought up the newspaper, and had been reading it in the balcony. as i was getting the bike warmed up i noticed that didi matityahus doormen deveated from their usual patrol walk and had entered my bulding. they were looking for aliens. they found some workers and had them all stand out on the pavment and took all the IDs for inspection. one of them was atrainee, and the other guy was telling him all the things he needs to look for.

as i only had thr eos 3 in the bag i ran up to get the digital camera just in case somthing heppens there or i might have to intervene. but nothing happend and i went on my way.

i was lamost finshed payitng at the exhibition space at school when miki walked in and gave me a light blo to the gut and sait "well - lets hear it - i dont want you to keep anything in let it all out". we then continued to have a verry long and usfull conversation that after all the anticlimax this year has been and the exhibition in particular was just the best conclusion one could hope for. miki is the best. i am now feeling not so bad about this thing.

after work i went out to give the invitations to the opening to the kids. some were there. it spent some time there and then moved on. they werrent verry happy and warent all there. that is the ones that were there warent all there. i guess i need to keep on shooting in this scene there is still much to be gained and learned from this. i am serusly tihnknig about nimrods proposal to do e becher like water tower project in israel. time will tell.

then i saw some aremed jews. they are crazy.